I hate autocorrect... with a passion. Autocorrect has single-handedly ruined entire days of my life. There's no denying that we are living in incredible times. All around us we have tools and gadgets specifically designed to make our lives easier and our experiences better. Laptops, smartphones, satnavs, wifi, WhatsApp, Spotify, Skype; the list of marvellous inventions is endless. And then there's autocorrect.
A few months ago I was busy sending emails out to a list of retailers that we'd met at a show. One of them in particular had caught my eye. It was a wonderful little shop and I knew that our cards would fit right in. The buyer was a lovely lady called Mabel and she had seemed very excited about our 'Sad Stickman' range so I began... "Dear Mabel, It was lovely to meet you at the show last week..." and off I went carefully constructing the perfect email complete with an enticing introductory offer that I was sure would do the trick. A quick scan over the email and then I pressed send. But the very second I heard the swoosh of the email leaving my mailbox, my heart leapt into my throat. There before my eyes in big black letters was "Dear Marble"... MARBLE?? Why, autocorrect, why would I be writing to a marble?? Frantically I pressed every key on the keyboard before slamming the screen shut in a desperate attempt to undo the damage that had been done. But it was too late. When I reopened the laptop, the message to Marble was sat stubbornly in my sent box.
Luckily for us, before we'd managed to offend the entire greetings industry, we discovered a magical folk known as Sales Agents. They are a fearless race who long ago marched uninvited into the gift shops, galleries and museums of our great nation dragging their trolley bag of wonders behind them. They spent long days on the road, braving wind and rain and traffic jams. They demanded audiences with owners and buyers and then they launched a tirade of charm and wizardry on them and as they turned to leave the buyers chorused, 'Perhaps you'll come back next month?' And they did, and they kept coming back and now they are regularly received in all of the finest shops in their areas. Now for a 20% commission you can get your cards into their trolley bag of wonders and I will say without hesitation that of all the expenses that we face at the end of the month, the commission statements are the ones that we relish the most. Because a good Sales Agent will study your cards and they will know exactly where to take them and they will know exactly how to sell them and they will never, ever call Mable a marble.